Begin with gratitude
Start the review by recalling specific gifts and good moments of the day.
Key takeaways
- What it is: Start the review by recalling specific gifts and good moments of the day.
- Why it works: Opening with gratitude sets the emotional frame for the whole review, so the honest self-examination that follows happens from a stance of security rather than threat. Recalling specific goods also counters the negativity bias that would otherwise let the day’s good moments go unregistered.
- Evidence: Plausible mechanism, limited direct outcome data.
- Avoid: Rushing past gratitude to get to the "what did I do wrong" part, which turns the Examen into a self-critical audit instead of a balanced review.
Why it works
Opening with gratitude sets the emotional frame for the whole review, so the honest self-examination that follows happens from a stance of security rather than threat. Recalling specific goods also counters the negativity bias that would otherwise let the day’s good moments go unregistered.
How to do it
- 1Settle for a moment, then look back over the day from its start.
- 2Name a few specific things you are grateful for, including small ones.
- 3Let yourself actually feel the gratitude rather than listing it mechanically.
What the evidence says
MechanisticThe Examen’s gratitude-first structure aligns with positive-psychology findings that gratitude practices support well-being; the Examen itself as a protocol is a centuries-old contemplative practice, not a trialed intervention.
Honest caveat: The general gratitude evidence is solid, but the Examen specifically is supported by tradition and practitioner report rather than controlled study.
Common mistake
Rushing past gratitude to get to the "what did I do wrong" part, which turns the Examen into a self-critical audit instead of a balanced review.
IX Coach can open your evening review with a gratitude prompt tuned to your actual day, so the reflection starts from steadiness rather than self-judgment.
Practice this with IX Coach →