Model vulnerability and uncertainty as a leader to accelerate safety
Deliberately share your own uncertainties, mistakes, and questions — it gives permission for others to do the same.
Key takeaways
- What it is: Deliberately share your own uncertainties, mistakes, and questions — it gives permission for others to do the same.
- Why it works: Leaders set the emotional temperature of the team. When a leader performs certainty and infallibility, the implicit norm is that uncertainty is weakness — and team members hide their own uncertainty accordingly. When a leader models vulnerability, they socially license the team to do the same, accelerating movement through all four safety stages simultaneously.
- Evidence: Backed by observational / correlational evidence.
- Avoid: Sharing vulnerabilities that are really humble-brags — "I sometimes care too much about quality" — rather than genuine uncertainties. The team detects the performance and it reduces rather than builds safety.
Why it works
Leaders set the emotional temperature of the team. When a leader performs certainty and infallibility, the implicit norm is that uncertainty is weakness — and team members hide their own uncertainty accordingly. When a leader models vulnerability, they socially license the team to do the same, accelerating movement through all four safety stages simultaneously.
How to do it
- 1In team settings, regularly say "I’m not sure" or "I got this wrong" without immediately salvaging the admission with a justification.
- 2Ask genuine questions where you don’t know the answer, and let the team see you update based on what you hear.
- 3Share a past professional failure in enough detail that the team can extract a real lesson.
- 4Distinguish modeled vulnerability (genuine, serves the team) from performed vulnerability (strategic, serves your image) — people can tell the difference.
What the evidence says
ObservationalResearch on leader self-disclosure finds that authentic leader disclosure increases follower trust and willingness to take interpersonal risks. Brown’s research on vulnerability as a strength provides the broader cultural framing.
Honest caveat: Leader vulnerability research faces a moderating variable: status and context determine whether vulnerability reads as trustworthy or incompetent. The same disclosure can have opposite effects depending on leader credibility and situation.
- — Brown (2012), Daring Greatly — vulnerability and trust in leadership contexts
Common mistake
Sharing vulnerabilities that are really humble-brags — "I sometimes care too much about quality" — rather than genuine uncertainties. The team detects the performance and it reduces rather than builds safety.
IX Coach invites genuine uncertainty and models it in return — sharing when the coaching approach is exploratory rather than certain, demonstrating that uncertainty is the normal condition of growth.
Practice this with IX Coach →