The last-time awareness practice
Periodically notice when you might be doing something for the last time — and let that awareness deepen your engagement.
Key takeaways
- What it is: Periodically notice when you might be doing something for the last time — and let that awareness deepen your engagement.
- Why it works: We are rarely conscious of last times as they happen: the last time we carry a child, the last family meal in a home we’re leaving, the last conversation with someone who will move away. The retrospective awareness of these moments is often painful precisely because they passed without full presence. Deliberately applying a "last time" lens periodically — not obsessively — activates the same impermanence awareness that mono no aware cultivates.
- Evidence: Backed by observational / correlational evidence.
- Avoid: Applying the "last time" lens to everything and every day — which converts the practice into death anxiety rather than engaged appreciation. Selective use is essential to the practice working.
Why it works
We are rarely conscious of last times as they happen: the last time we carry a child, the last family meal in a home we’re leaving, the last conversation with someone who will move away. The retrospective awareness of these moments is often painful precisely because they passed without full presence. Deliberately applying a "last time" lens periodically — not obsessively — activates the same impermanence awareness that mono no aware cultivates.
How to do it
- 1Once a week, identify one recurring activity and genuinely ask: "Could this be the last time?"
- 2Allow the question to heighten presence for the duration of the activity — not as morbid obsession but as sharpened attention.
- 3Note afterward what you noticed that habitual repetition had filtered out.
- 4Do not apply this to every experience daily — it works through selective, deliberate application.
What the evidence says
ObservationalResearch on savoring through imagined endings shows that contemplating the termination of a positive experience increases present engagement with it. "Last time" framing is a specific, powerful application of this mechanism.
Honest caveat: Research tests single-session interventions; habitual last-time framing could potentially activate anxiety rather than appreciation if overdone. The practice works through deliberate, limited application.
- — Kurtz (2008), looking to the future to appreciate the present, Psychological Science
Common mistake
Applying the "last time" lens to everything and every day — which converts the practice into death anxiety rather than engaged appreciation. Selective use is essential to the practice working.
IX Coach occasionally asks "what would you pay attention to differently if you knew this period was nearing its end?" — using the last-time lens to restore engagement without requiring calendar certainty.
Practice this with IX Coach →