Seek awe in collective rituals and shared experience
Experience something vast alongside others to amplify both the awe and the connection.
Key takeaways
- What it is: Experience something vast alongside others to amplify both the awe and the connection.
- Why it works: Keltner argues that awe evolved partly as a social-cohesion mechanism — experienced together, it synchronizes bodies (goosebumps, tears, stillness), dissolves distinctions between self and group, and produces the "we" focus that underlies collective action. Shared awe activates the small-self effect simultaneously in multiple people, making connection effortless rather than a project.
- Evidence: Plausible mechanism, limited direct outcome data.
- Avoid: Consuming the same awe-producing content (films, videos) alone, which provides the emotional experience but not the synchrony and shared presence that make collective awe specifically bonding.
Why it works
Keltner argues that awe evolved partly as a social-cohesion mechanism — experienced together, it synchronizes bodies (goosebumps, tears, stillness), dissolves distinctions between self and group, and produces the "we" focus that underlies collective action. Shared awe activates the small-self effect simultaneously in multiple people, making connection effortless rather than a project.
How to do it
- 1Attend one live, collective awe experience per month: a concert, a ceremony, a game, a natural event at a gathering point.
- 2Do not narrate it to the people beside you — let shared silence be the connection.
- 3After, compare what struck each person; the conversation deepens the bond.
What the evidence says
MechanisticKeltner’s cultural and evolutionary argument for collective awe is supported by anthropological evidence and by the observation that awe reliably produces prosocial, we-focused cognition; direct trials of collective awe are limited.
Honest caveat: The collective-awe argument is the least experimentally tested aspect of Keltner’s work; the social-cohesion pathway is theoretically strong and anthropologically plausible.
Common mistake
Consuming the same awe-producing content (films, videos) alone, which provides the emotional experience but not the synchrony and shared presence that make collective awe specifically bonding.
IX Coach can suggest a specific shared awe activity for a relationship you want to strengthen, turning the practice into a concrete plan for one connection at a time.
Practice this with IX Coach →